Women Celebrate
Feb 18 - 20, 2011
Peggy Driessen

Who am I?

Hi, I'm Peggy Driessen. I have had the honor to have been able to attend
Women Celebrate every year with the exception of the very first one. I must be doing something right, because they keep asking me back. Where else can you go to be with 400 Christian women, all on a faith journey, who you can laugh, learn, sing and weep with - as one. So just sit back and enjoy where you are at, because it is going to take you where you need to be.

Those of you who don't know me, I was diagnosed with a terminal disease, ALS, better known as Lou Gehrig's in 2002. Lou Gehrig's is known as one of the cruelest, most unsympathetic diseases. Currently, there is no cure. I wake each morning wondering what muscle group the disease will rob me of next. I have no use of my arms, and my legs and neck muscles are becoming very weak. My tongue and lungs are also affected because they are muscles. By the end of the day when I am fatigued, I sound like a garbled drunk. In the end you literally become trapped within your own body, unable to move or talk and are hardly able to breath. Through all of this, your brain is never affected, so you remain aware of your surroundings, and what people are saying to you, but your response is very limited. Yes, this disease SUCKS.

There are different forms of ALS. Unfortunately, about 95% of victims pass within 2 - 3 years of being diagnosed. I have known I had ALS almost 9 years, my Doctor, from Froederts, tells me I am in my miracle mile. Talk about a miracle mile .. .in 2006 I was also diagnosed with stage 3 melanoma cancer. Because I have ALS I could not take chemo or radiation because the Drs. said it would have killed me. One year and 9 surgeries later, I am proud to say I have not seen my cancer Dr. in 2 years! This is the power of prayer, so never under estimate it.

Through my journey with ALS and cancer, I wouldn't have done as well as I have, with as great an attitude as I have, without my wonderful support group. Who are they? My husband Jerry of 28 years and my 3 adult children and their significant
others. My wonderful Share the Care group. They keep me whole. They are my family, my friends, and those who have volunteered to be my hands by taking over my normal routine, so that my immediate family remains healthy, physically and mentally. Because of them my family continues to spend quality time together. They do the scheduling and make sure
someone is there each day to care for me. They are my angels.
 
Now that you understand a bit about me and my life, I want to talk about my purpose here on Earth. We, you and I, are the Body and the Bride of Christ. It is up to us to bring Jesus to the world. We all know that Jesus did not do his teaching from a church pulpit. He was amongst his people, working his miracles. What purpose can a terminally ill person, who can't even care for
themselves anymore, do to make a difference? We are powerful women. We need to make sure that the example Jesus set on Earth are understood and practiced by our children, our families, our friends and even our enemies. Yes, I may not be able to care for myself, but I still have a voice and plenty of time to prepare the things I need to say to those I love. I need those thoughts to be known. I need my children to know how important it is for them to live a Christian life not only as part of the church but within their community. It is not a building that gives life, it is its people. Our children need to know this and
pass it along to their children. Otherwise, the future of our world is bleak. As women, we need to work together at this. It is said, lilt takes a community to raise a child". Your examples are seen by others. You never know who you are touching with your words and your actions.

Unfortunately, the things we spend most of our time on, are not preparing us for heaven. If it doesn't get you closer to your goal, don't do it. So why do we waste our precious time? My illness has made me acutely aware of that fact. While attending mass recently, that feeling came over me again. After listening to a homily that touched my heart, I reflected on my week, and did not feel worthy of receiving his body and blood of Christ. What had I done to deserve the body and blood of Christ, after all he'd done for me? I had a melt down in church. My husband was wiping tears from my chin because I can't get my arms up to my face anymore. He asked if I needed to go the cry room with the rest of the children. So far to go, so little time. We need to be examples to our families and friends. This is a very true summary of women I recently read about that sums up so much of what our purpose is: Women have strengths that amaze men .....

· They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.
· They smile when they want to scream.
· They sing when they want to cry.
· They cry when they are happy and laugh when they are nervous.
· They fight for what they believe in.
· They stand up to injustice.
· They don't take "no" for an answer when they believe there is a better solution.
· They go without so their family can have.
· They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
· They love unconditionally.
· They cry when their children excel and cheer when their friends get awards.
· They are happy when they hear about a birth, or a wedding.
· Their hearts break when a friend dies.
· They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
· They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.
· Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.
· They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mall you to show how much they care about you.
· The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
· They bring joy, hope and love.
· They have compassion and ideas.
· They give moral support to their family and friends.
· Women have vital things to say and everything to give.

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN, IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

I am here to tell each of you that you are worth 1000x more than you know because your purpose is not your own, and neither is mine. It is Gods. We are here for God's purpose alone. Our time is short compared to eternity. Know your worth in God's eyes and live with that purpose in mind. So, where am I now on my faith journey with God? At times I compare myself to others. Does God have a measuring stick? Dam straight he does! He takes it once in a while and cracks me over the head to remind me what is important in life and what is not. Sometimes our purpose is not in activity, it is in being still. Your house doesn't need to be spotless, but you need to be sure to tell your families that you love them each day. Remember to enjoy the days God gives
you. Don't be blind and miss those opportunities. Don't just go along for the ride, enjoy the view.
 
I have learned to be much better at saying kind words like "please" and "thank you", especially to my husband. Those simple words go a long way. They make people feel great and make them feel like they are not being taken for granted.
This is good advice both at home and the workplace. We all have highs and lows. We know when we are entering the valley, and when things are not quite right with life. There is discontent. Sometimes I can easily stand on my own, and other times I need lots of help. That is when I pray, or get together with those who are on a great faith journey. It always pulls me up.
I love to talk to my caregivers. I find those who are giving are the happiest people.
 
People have told me I am a hero. This completely baffles me. Is it because for me it is easier to say "life is great", rather than going into the doom and gloom of my aches, pains and woes of wasting away? I can hold people up by smiling and being positive. In turn, they hold me up by doing the same. Maybe we are asking the wrong questions. May we should all be rephrasing and say "Tell me something great that happened to you today!" Here are a few questions to ponder regarding our faith journeys.

Are those on their knees going to make it before those who sit and pray? I hope not, I can't kneel anymore.
Are those who do works for the church vs. those who are simply kind on a better journey? I hope not, I can't get to church without someone driving me. I wish I could still sing the praises, but soon I'll have no voice. Don't live for others, or as others do. Each of our faith journeys are designed by God. Be still and listen, he will guide you in how to live. I sit still often, mostly
because I have no choice. Because of that I spend more time praying, not for myself, but for others. I offer my pain and suffering for the soul ln purgatory. learned that from a very gifted speaker here at Women Celebrate last year. I am certain that at least 10 people get their wings each day because of that!

There are times my caregivers have more problems than I do. I find that just being there, being still and listening can be my gift to them for the love they show me. It is a gift of presence. Let's go back to my miracle mile. Now understand, I intend to live 20 more years. My miracle mile isn't the end, maybe it's the beginning! I AM Peggy Driessen and I choose life. That statement is how I ended my first talk at Women Celebrate. When does life begin? It begins when you get out of your comfort zone! I am no longer in what I would have considered my zone. I remember not too long ago that I stood on this stage and told you that my goal was to see my children graduate from High School. They did. My youngest will graduate from college in May. And my son just got engaged, so now I've upped the ante to seeing them all get married. Hopefully the next milestone will be grandchildren. life and all it's miracle. So little time, so much to do!

How I am preparing my way to heaven?
I felt like I received my death sentence when I was diagnosed with ALS. I knew a bit more than many of you about what my journey would look like. Just because I know, and you don't, doesn't make you exempt. We are all going to die, and none us know when or how. I don't even know for sure that I will die from ALS. And am I afraid of death? No. Am I afraid of the day I meet the lord? Yes. What I worry about is whether or not I will be worthy to be with God in his Kingdom for eternity. Will you measure up to Jesus' example?  Where are we on God's measuring stick? There are times my caregivers have more problems than I do. I find that just being there, being still and listening can be my gift to them for the love they show me. It is a gift of presence.
Let's go back to my miracle mile. Now understand, I intend to live 20 more years. My miracle mile isn't the end, maybe it's the beginning! I feel scared, in the same way now, when I am alone and standing at the top of a set of stairs. I'm petrified because I am very unstable. I am afraid to take the first step. If I fall, I have no arms to catch myself. Once I have fallen, I have no
one to pick me up. When someone is beside me, I feel calm, and I know if I stumble and fall they will be there to catch me, and comfort me. It is the same 'with Jesus. When he is there he makes the journey so much easier. I was asked to tell each of you how I am preparing to meet the lord as the Bride of Christ. One word - Surrender. Surrender is admitting our lack of control in
our lives. It's praying for God's will to be done while surrendering our own. We all need to rely on God for what we need rather than relying on ourselves. That type of trust is difficult to achieve. As we move through life toward death, we are required to surrender more of ourselves---power, control, security, fear, agendas, ambition, bitterness, anger, unforgiveness, hurt, hair, hearing, eyesight, our figures, independence. I don't always know what cross God is asking me to carry in my surrender. I know it is very heavy at times, and I would also like to say there are days it feels very light. Like, after I spend a day with my sisters, seeing my children achieve, giving strength to another ALS victim as they struggle for answers, Old Fashions, my caregivers smiling faces in the morning. As I look around this room I see many faces. Everyone carries their own cross, and some even help others carry theirs. We enter into the intimacy of being one with Jesus in his suffering. We need to yield and to pray to move beyond our will, our pride and our agendas. In doing so we open our hearts to have God reveal his direction in our lives. All that we are and all that we have belongs to God. Some days our surrender is "I can't. God can. And I'm going to let Him." Surrender is a life-long process until the day we die .. --for each of us. We can't cling to our possessions or the health of our bodies. If we loosen our grip and open our hands, we let go of this world and have our hand open to receive the grace of God. It is in giving up everything that I can receive God's love -and I will be saved from the world, myself, and J will be free at last. That is the desire we all have in our surrender-to be free at last. That is the real journey in our lives.

"To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did" When God takes something from your grasp. He's not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better. I have received the gift of constantly being in touch with people. I always have many people in my life. After my diagnosis, I have become. so much closer with people. I am not just an acquaintance, but a close friend. I have learned the beauty, fears and joys of my friends. I can truly say I am now a friend. ALS had given me the joy of true friendship. What is God putting in your open hand? "The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you. Remember that. Go out on YOUR limb. You may not feel comfortable, but to do God's will here on Earth you need to stretch.

My prayer for you:
When you are lonely .• I wish you love.
When you are down .•• I wish you joy.
When you are troubled ..• I wish you peace.
When things are complicated •• .I wish you simple beauty.
When things are chaotic ••• I wish you inner peace.
When things look empty •• I wish you hope.
And in all things .•.• I wish you Jesus.